Tag: Chicago Page 1 of 2

Birthday dinner: 2026.

For the past three years we have made a tradition of spending my birthday at the Firehouse restaurant (1401 S. Michigan Ave.), Mayor Daley’s favorite restaurant and one at which “W” once celebrated his birthday while in Chicago. It’s a 7 hour drive from the Quad Cities, but I’ve had a condo in Chicago since 2003 within walking distance of the Firehouse; I’ve eaten there many times.

2025 Birthday

Birthday, 2025.

Last year, my daughter and her fiancé flew in from Nashville to celebrate my 80^th trip around the sun . We went to the Green Mill following dinner. A good time was had by all. Even the nearby diners were delightful, a small girl who played peek-a-boo with us, hiding behind her dinner napkin. We had a lovely circular booth up front and a banner was stretched across it, wishing me a Happy 80^th Birthday. Dinner was expensive, but delicious.

At the Firehouse in 2024, celebrating my birthday with the girl next booth over.

2024 Birthday

Dinner at the Firehouse in 2024—just the two of us—was also memorable and friend Jackie from Austin phoned in to wish me a happy birthday while we were dining. I began telling everyone how great the Firehouse experience has been over the 23 years I’ve had a place just down the street.

2024 Birthday.

2026 Birthday

This year, BFF Jackie from Austin decided she’d like to escape the Austin heat and fly into Chicago on the 17^th of July to spend a week sight-seeing, and join me for my annual birthday dinner at the Firehouse, which I had praised to the woman who spent her career in the restaurant industry (and was basically the originator of GrubHub). Jackie wanted to stay at the St. Regis and had a suite booked.

Dressed for dinner 2026.

I drove into the city on the July 14^h to get ready for Jackie’s arrival, stop at the Bank of America (again), clean the condo, and get groceries in anticipation for the arrivals of Jackie, college roommate Pam Rhodes (from Des Moines), my spouse of 58 years Craig and—potentially—another recently widowed girlfriend from Corpus Christi, Texas, whom I invited via snail mail. Sadly, she also just lost her sister and was not coming.

Jackie spent at least a month planning the museums and shows she wanted to visit while in the city. Cindy’s atop the Athletic Club. The Gwen Terrace restaurant. Second City. Jazz Club. Blues Club. Museums, including the Field, the Art Institute, the Museum of Science and Industry. Architecture cruise. Rosa’s Blues Club in Logan Square (or Buddy Guy’s.) Andy’s Jazz Club on E. Hubbard Street. Rented scooters. Dinner at Miru’s, the St. Regis, fireworks night.

Best friend of 63 years, Pam Rhodes and me, ready for the Firehouse birthday night.

A few days prior to her arrival, Jackie had to call an ambulance to take her to the hospital, which put her on an antibiotic IV drip. They urged her to stay in the hospital for four days. Cellulitis had caused her arm to swell to three times its normal size. Her blood pressure was 100/200. She began canceling all Chicago reservations from her hospital room.

I was already here; I retained 2 restaurant reservations and the Second City Monday night show.

Second City, Monday, July 20th.

Most of the reservations were for rooftop restaurants. For two days, the burning forests in Canada caused heavy smoke in Chicago. The terrace at the Gwen Hotel closed. I literally could not leave the condo for two days, as I have asthma (and cancer and diabetes and fibromyalgia and various lesser ailments)

I soldiered on, celebrating solo around town, a unique experience.

I was unsure whether my college roommate and best friend of 63 years was going to make the trip to Chicago for my July 23^rd birthday or not. She lost her husband of 59 years on Valentine’s Day. She didn’t know if she felt up to the trip. A second widow friend from Texas, invited by snail mail, didn’t respond until I asked again on Facebook Messenger. (Not coming).

Jackie was locked in debate with her doctors about whether she was going to have to spend 4 days in St. David’s Hospital in Austin on an IV drip. Since they recently were written up as having rats in their kitchen, she was ordering all her food delivered to her by Grubhub while hospitalized. Sounds normal.

Friday, July 17^th
I did Gwen’s restaurant solo. Nice couple (Brad and Tonya) from Grand Rapids, took pity on me in the elevator ride up. Brad is a CFO from Grand Rapids celebrating his 25^th anniversary with wife Tonya. A table of Pi Phi friends from the University of Missouri sang Happy Birthday to me. I was presented a complimentary dessert. People were very nice.

CFO Brad from Grand Rapids at the Gwen on Friday, July 17th.

July 19^th, Sunday

Kept the reservations for Cindy’s atop the Athletic Club. Great view! A very nice couple from Boston, mother and son, Joanne and Jay, bought me a drink at the bar upon hearing that I was out and about on my solo birthday tour. We dined together. Jay was a 5^th grade teacher They were traveling to the Black Hills, mourning the recent death of their husband and father.

July 20^th, Monday

Blake Jones, my great waiter at Cindy’s.

I drove myself to Second City for the 7 p.m. show. I even tried out an app that found cheap parking in Piper’s Alley ($23.12), SpotHero, although it ended up costing me an additional $38 when the QR code reader was MIA and I had to take a paper ticket. The attendants (whose voices were unintelligible) were not keen to allow me to exit the garage at 10 p.m. I’m still negotiating with SpotHero. The Second City show was good. Second City gifted me with tee shirts and assorted merchandise. Three people from Oklahoma seated behind me in my front row seat chatted with me. Show was good. People were very nice, even if the machines were not.

July 22, Wednesday

My new friends (Jan and Jay) from Boston at Cindy’s atop the Chicago Athletic Club.

My husband arrived with BFF Pam in tow. We dined at Tapas Valencia.Excellent beef medallions. Free street parking.

July 23, Thursday THE REAL DAY

Today was the real birthday date. It was also Pat Hanlin’s birthday. I always sent Pat a birthday card on our mutual birthday date ( her year was 1942; mine 1945). Pat was buried July 19. Rest in peace, Pat. I’ll always remember the “surprise” Vegas trip four girlfriends took. One of them told me, in my kitchen (during a party I was throwing), “We were going to invite you, since it’s your birthday, too, but we asked D**** S*****, instead.” [Always nice to be included. Names have been changed to protect the guilty.]

May15, Friday

Bruno Mars played Chicago on May 16^th. I attended the Soldier Field with my daughter and her BFF Amanda (my Dutch daughter). I insisted that we stop, in person, at the Firehouse to make a reservation for my third year celebrating my birthday at this excellent and always busy restaurant. Based on the previous two years of celebrating at the Firehouse, I talked up the experience to Austin friend Jackie, planning to fly in from Austin, Texas, as well as to BFF and college roommate Pam. I chatted with the reservations woman. I remembered her from previous years of celebrations. I reminisced about the previous year’s birthday, when a lovely banner (like the ones beauty pageant contestants wear; visible in the 2024 photo) was draped across the table of the roomy circular booth up front.

This year’s (2026) message at table-top, after we moved to a different booth from the original corner table. No banners this year.

Talked with the reservations lady about how this would be a three-year tradition of celebrating my birthday at the Firehouse. The reservations were for 7:30 p.m. Thursday, July 23^rd.

A short time later I received an e-mail confirming the reservation . The reservation was for JUNE 23^rd. Fortunately, I noticed that the reservation was for the wrong month. My husband called and changed it. I continued to praise the Firehouse to others who might come to this very small party (Have all your parties before you’re 70; otherwise, nearly everyone you want to see will be gone). I looked forward to this birthday extravaganza week with people coming from 4 different cities and all sorts of great activites. And, of course, to the Firehouse itself. It’s a historic building with a real firehouse pole and great food.

The Firehouse.

Thursday, July 23, 2026

My daughter in Nashville called to wish me a Happy Birthday. Stacey& her musician fiancée (Will Allison of Wild Bill and the Bruisers) were dining out. Someone stole his bass fiddle and all of the musical equipment out of his van. Stacey checked pawn shops in the Nashville area; a friend started a GoFundMe account.The musical equipment he needs was recovered late in the day. Seemed somehow typical of the week like, “Sure, THAT happened today.”

When we entered the Firehouse at 1401 S. Michigan, we were escorted to a corner table, not one of the booths of previous birthday visits. I asked Emma, the hostess, about this. She asked if I had requested a booth. I explained that it was my 81^st birthday, our third year of celebrating here on July 23rd, and yes, I had requested a booth 70 DAYS IN ADVANCE. On May 15^th. In person.

Firehouse bar.

Emma, the pretty young hostess this night, hearing that I was upset about the corner we had been shoved into, led us to a recessed booth that we were told was “the owner’s table.” It was a step up from the corner, although not the circular booth of 2024 and 2025. I thanked her for her efforts and was grateful that she seemed to agree that celebrating an 81^st birthday (the third year we had patronized the Firehouse for my birthday), was maybe worth the effort to at least put us on the reservation list for the right month. What if I had not noticed it said “June” instead of “July”?

Because I had just had beef medallions at Tapas Valencia on State Street on Wednesday, the lobster special ($54) sounded good. We did ask specific questions about the lobster, as it listed many strange herbs. My husband wanted to know if it was “just cut up pieces of lobster.”Brian, the waiter, specifically mentioned 8 ounces, but obviously he was counting the various inedible herbs for about 3/4 of that. We asked twice if it was just “cut up pieces” of lobster. Brian said the lobster had been removed from the shell with various herbs surrounding it on the plate, which was a misleading description, putting it mildly. (The lobster, itself, when it arrived, could not have weighed more than an ounce and a half. It was about four bites of actual lobster meat.) We regret not taking a photo, but it was a fairly large let-down.

I also ordered the lobster bisque, because it is always delicious with a puff top pastry finish. It came and was steaming hot and was very good. I was happy that I had ordered it when my mini-meal arrived. My husband and my best friend ordered the steak and fries. Their meals were very good. They were kind enough to give me a bite of theirs when my “lobster” turned out to be 4 bites of lobster swimming in the herbs mentioned. My remark, “This must have been the smallest lobster in captivity,” There was no warm butter to dip the lobster in, either. It’s a good thing I take Mounjaro shots for my diabetes. That means I never have any appetite. Otherwise, without the few bites of steak from my companions, I would have gone home hungry.

Inside the Chicago Athletic Club. I once got a writing award there, back when it was a private club, but it is not the same at all.

At some point the manager, Ivan Garrido, came by to see how things were going.

I was unwilling to get into the complete disaster my meal was, but my BFF from Des Moines pretty much let Ivan have it. (People from Des Moines are not intimidated by descriptions of a dish that are misleading and lead to the presentation of a four-bite meal. Brian, the waiter, should have recognized that, since he had Iowa roots.) Brian reminded me of Robert Preston in that classic play and film “The Music Man” in his recitation of the desserts and what the lobster special would be like. This will date me to 1962, but the patter of “We’ve got trouble, right here in River City” really fit the slick presentation.

The restaurant removed the $54 charge from our bill after the manager listened to the BFF from Des Moines. That was appreciated. I filled him in on the problems involving reserving us for the wrong month, entirely—which would have been exceptionally bad if I had not noticed it, or if my Austin friend had managed to make it to Chicago for this birthday dinner. I told Ivan of the tradition of celebrating my birthday here. I’m sending him this blog entry, so he can see the pictures for himself. Regrets that I didn’t photograph the smallest lobster in captivity.

Dessert at the Gwen (closed) terrace restaurant.

I explained that—for a birthday that most of us would agree makes me a fossil—the experience this year was a bit disappointing. I had “talked up” this restaurant for years,—especially this year with 3 people originally coming from 3 different states. At 81, having just observed from a distance the burial of the woman who shared my birth date, I mentioned to the manager that there might not be that many more hale and healthy birthdays in my future. The Firehouse sent home desserts that nobody wanted to eat (we had a cake at the condo).

I felt bad that my Austin friend had missed the entire week she had planned. I do wonder what a food industry pro would have had to say about this night. Or this week. Between the smoke, the bass fiddle theft, people trying to celebrate despite grief and Larry the Lobster, it was an experience.

The birthday “week” is almost over.

Tomorrow, Friday (7/24) we will take in “The Odyssey” in Imax. The movie runs 3 hours and the parking at the old Icon off Roosevelt Road only comps you for about half of that time and makes it nearly impossible to buy popcorn without a lengthy wait. Plus you have to take a picture of your license plate and fill out a bunch of stuff to get comped anything at all. Plus we’re in the front row.

My new friends from Boston at Cindy’s.

On Saturday (7/25) the Art Institute beckons. I’m a member and have been since 2003. I/We didn’t make it to any museums with friend Jackie, home now and on the mend from her 8^th hospitalization in 10 years.

Remember this line from Louie C.K.: “Live in the present, because there’s too much of the past and not enough of the future.”

Printers’ Row, 2023, on Sunday, September 10th

By Connie Wilson

On September 13, 2023

In Books, News, Of Local (Quad Cities') Interest

Printers’ Row, 2023.

After much vacillating, I committed to spending my entire Sunday, September 10^th, in the streets of Chicago selling books at Printers’ Row.

I have done Printers’ Row with the Illinois Presswomen group for years, but last year, when I selected Sunday, it rained buckets. I took one look out the window and realized that we would not be journeying to Printers’ Row that day.

So, scratch Printers’ Row, 2022.

I had selected Sunday because it was $10 cheaper than Saturday, which was also true this year; it cost $130 to be present at the booth from 10 a.m. until 6 p.m. My Presswomen group does not allow you to purchase half of the 8 hour time, which is unfortunate. I am good for 4 hours. In other years, have split up the time from 10 to 2 and 2 to 6, with me taking the late time. The plan was to pay me for ½ of the $130 fee when I showed up to relieve the first author in the morning slot.

This worked out well until the year before the downpour, when people who had said they would show up and man the booth from 10 to 2 bailed at the last minute. It was too late for me to secure another partner. This left me holding the bag

Ellie the Elephant and Elena Ashley.

for the entire day, which is exactly what happened this year. If I am “out” $65, I have a good chance of breaking even. Not so at $130.

I got up at 9 a.m. and was at the booth by 10 a.m.

By 2 p.m. I was ready to quit, but I continued until 5:05 p.m.

Considering that I am only able to stay awake for about four hours, this 9-hour shift pretty much wiped me out. I am not up to full strength after 33 radiation sessions for cancer. The Tamoxifen I have most recently been taking has a known side effect of extreme exhaustion. I just had blood work done on August 30^th to determine why I am only really “alert” for 4 hours.

My spot at the table was between a fun African American group selling books for $10 (like me) with a “one book for $5” offer and the words “gasp” frequently repeated, and a woman with a large stuffed elephant, who gave me a handout that said her name was Dr. Elena Ashley. I asked the author to my left if she had ever taught school about three times. I never really received a response that pinned that down, although Ms. Ashley has written “A Teaching Guide for Educators and Parents.” The characters in her books are apparently named Splunkkunio Splunkey, Detective and Peacemaker and Big Bully Holly Howler, in addition to Ellie the Elephant.

The stuffed elephant was quite large and Dr. Ashley kept speaking in a high voice to simulate “Ellie the Elephant.” As someone who used to travel with a costumed Cat in the Hat, I understand the desire to attract children with such ploys (although, in my own case, it caused very small children to run screaming from the library!), but listening to someone talk in a high falsetto voice for 6 straight hours can really be a trial. I may have been heard to mutter “Just shoot me now” after five hours of Ellie the Elephant.

I didn’t have as much table space as the elephant lady, because she had gotten there first. At various times she had her husband and a young African American child pulled up to the table on chairs. I felt like you do on a crowded airplane flight when you have nowhere to put your feet, because you have stuffed your purse under the seat in front of you and other stuff under the middle seat. In my own case, I had a large yellow bag with prop-up things for my books and table cloths and change boxes and my charged Square device. All had to be stuffed under the table, because of the 3 occupied chairs to my left and behind me.

Most of the people in my vicinity complained that the price of parking their car had escalated dramatically from $20 to $80. My spouse dropped me off and picked me back up; that went well, saving us $80. I also took my own lunch, which probably saved me a large amount, also. As usual, Art Brauer, our President, had done a great job setting up the booth and providing water and chips. (Thanks, Art.)

I never anticipate making any money at Printers’ Row. My goal is always to break even and to participate. I can’t make many of the Presswomen meetings, so this is something I can and should do.

I met a lovely woman from LeClaire, who had actually read all 3 of my “The Color of Evil” novels and talked about her plans to open a bookstore/tequila bar in LeClaire once she retires from her duties teaching at Pleasant Valley High School. I also met a political science professor, who said he was considering using my “Obama’s Odyssey: The 2008 Race for the White House” (Vols. I & II) as a text in his classes. Both of these were nice developments, but, if you want to measure my day in dollars earned, I made $65, having spent $130. However, as mentioned, if this had been a “normal” year, my investment would have been ½ of the time, or $65, and that means I broke even, like most years.

A lot of work to just “break even” but I’m told I need to “get out there” more.

I also picked up about 10 new names for the mailing list, which is now topping 6,000 names.

Monet Immersive Exhibit in Chicago

By Connie Wilson

On July 25, 2022

In Local, Of Local (Quad Cities') Interest, travel

The Monet Immersive Exhibit provided many gorgeous tableaus. Dinner at La Cite atop Lake Point Tower was a gorgeous vantage point to view the city of Chicago.

The Germanium Club up north was totally taken over to facilitate the showing of Monet’s impressionistic works. It is a lovely display area, with the ability to purchase a glass of Prosecco to carry into the exhibit, but there are a lot of stairs. Visitors can lounge on banquettes or sit in a few folding chairs and there is a balcony, if you want to view the art work from above.

Following the Exhibit, we walked to the Corcoran Bar & Grill, in honor of my maiden name, and a lovely young lass from Galway, Ireland, waited on us.

Then it was home to the South Loop to watch a film. We actually used my CD collection and saved the $3.99 rental fee on Netflix.

All-in-all, a great night.

Nathan Sawaya Lego Art on Display in “The Art of the Brick” at the Museum of Science & Industry

By Connie Wilson

On May 30, 2022

In Education, Local, Of Local (Quad Cities') Interest, Pop Culture, travel

As described yesterday, we struck off for Memorial Day in Chicago on Friday, May 28th.

Museum of Science & Industry

Museum of Science & Industry

Museum of Science & Industry

Museum of Science & Industry, Memorial Day, 2022.

Easter Island face, from Legos.

Stacey provides scale for the statues.

Nefretiti

Starry, Starry Night

Whistler’s Mother

Grant Wood’s “American Gothic”

“The Girl With the Pearl Earring”

Mona Lisa

“The Scream”

We did see part of the Memorial Day Parade on Saturday, primarily because we were trapped in a Lyft car on our way to the downtown Macy’s store, where I had a mission to see if they could repair the strap to a purse that is, otherwise. I bought the original purse downtown at Water Tower Place at Macy’s and, if you don’t know this, Water Tower Place has become a bit of a Ghost Town, since Macy’s pulled out. We were headed for the old State Street store and dined in the Walnut Room (chicken pot pie, $15).

It took quite a while to navigate the extremely crowded streets, as many of them had been shut down for the parade. The weather, however, was terrific!

I got nowhere trying to find replacement straps or some form of repair for my brand-name purse, but I’m not done trying to fix the Michael Kors bag. If you know of someone in the Quad Cities that works with leather and can repair a 1/2 inch strap, let me know. (Most of the replacement straps on Amazon are wider at .56 Centimeters, and they mention something about “sewing,” which confuses me. Also, the original straps have attractive studs on them, which replacement straps would not have.

We saw Tom Cruise’s new “Maverick” movie on Saturday night, which I will talk about in another article. On Sunday, we trekked over to the Museum of Science & Industry to see the Lego exhibit that is on display. It is truly remarkable to see a lawyer hang up his law degree to, instead, spend major time and effort on building replicas of a variety of great art works. The artist, Nathan Sawaya, created this critically acclaimed collection of creative and inspiring pieces in a display entitled “The Art of the Brick.”

While you pay about $15 per person to enter the Museum of Science and Industry, you have to pay another $42 to see the Lego art, but the captured German submarine, a Museum staple, is free, and the various WWII aircraft, including Japanese Zero(s) and half of a large United 727 are free, as was the replica of the Wright Brothers first plane flown at Kitty Hawk in 1903 (for about a minute), which I portrayed pictures of on yesterday’s post.

Enjoy!

The Museum of Science & Industry, Chicago, Illinois

By Connie Wilson

On May 29, 2022

In Humor and Weird Wilson-isms, Of Local (Quad Cities') Interest, Pop Culture, Science and Medicine, travel

Stacey (L) and me.

So, aside from the Criterium (9:45 to 11:45 a.m. in the Village of East Davenport) in the Quad Cities, there did not seem to be much going on that I would have enjoyed. I can’t imagine that I’d have beaten a path over to see the bicycle race, and watching the Indianapolis 500 on TV can be doe anywhere.

So, I’m in Chicago right now and, as I post this week, I’ll try to post some of the wondrous creations made of Legos that are now the main exhibit t the Museum of Science and Industry.

But, as a lead-in, I’ll post a few pictures of the old planes from WWII, the Kitty Hawk first plane replica and my daughter and I pretending be various things in cut-outs (astronaut, in her case).

Come back in the succeeding days, as I attempt to get the pictures off my phone and onto my computer, which is not as easy as you’d think.(We have new phones, and apparently, if you don’t use “small,” the pictures are too complex to forward.)

So, here are the first few shots from the Museum of Science & Industry in Chicago.

Stacey as Vanna White,with dinosaur.

A dinosaur made completely out of Legos.

Stacey pretends to be Neal Armstrong.

Traveling Down to Texas: Day Two

By Connie Wilson

On November 30, 2020

In Uncategorized

Road to St. Louis.

Day Two of the Trip to Texas is upon us.

I stayed up until 2:30 a.m. posting the previous post. That gave me time to watch all of the Sunday morning news shows that I had taped, which I had not had a chance to watch before our departure for Chicago.

Being in Chicago at my place there also allowed us to watch “The Undoing” (final episode), “Fargo” (final episode) and make a meal from things in our freezer at home that would otherwise have been thrown out. Therefore, we had pork chops, green beans, left-over chicken (from Thanksgiving, when we cooked a 5 lb. chicken instead of a turkey.

The weather turned colder overnight and there was 5 inches of snow predicted for Northwest Indiana. Because we hadd food with us, we didn’t leave the condominium in downtown Chicago. It has been said that one out of every fifteen residents of Chicago tests positive for Covid-19. I asked two of the other residents of my building if anyone there in the South Loop had tested positive and they said no one had.

Sunset

But, he added, “I don’t know that they’d tell us if anyone had.”

We left at 12:30 for St. Louis and arrived about 5:30 p.m.

We have now finished watching “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” at my brother-in-law’s house, where we are missing Wendy (left us on April 18th).

Praying for good weather the rest of the way to Texas.

Travels to Texas: Night One

By Connie Wilson

On November 30, 2020

In Local, Of Local (Quad Cities') Interest, Texas, travel

Chicago

On the road again.

We’ve made it to Chicago and here is the view from my window. Way more lights in the South Loop than last year.

On the way in on I-55 there was some sort of accident, so the 40 miles to the heart of Chicago took longer than usual, but we’re here now and on to St. Louis tomorrow.

I brought pork chops from our freezer at home and cooked them (also had an onion from home) and made green beans (also from QC) and there was a little bit of left over chicken from the 5.6 pound chicken (Wilbur) we made for Thanksgiving.

The weather has taken a turn for the colder. You can feel it.

We watched the end of “The Undoing” (disappointed that it ended the way it did) and “Fargo” (also a disappointing and confusing ending) and now I’ve managed to make it through all the morning news

Chicago

shows, so it’s off to bed.

Book of Mormon Still A Hot Ticket in Chicago

By Connie Wilson

On April 14, 2013

In Reviews

“The Book of Mormon” has been a hot ticket for months. I was delighted to receive an e-mail informing me that—if I were willing to deal with “restricted seating”— (i.e., a thin pillar obscuring some of the view at Chicago’s Bank of America Theater as well as being stuck under the balcony in the very last Orchestra seating row with letter ZZZ—my ticket would be half-price at $56 rather than $113.) [*I once sat through a Rolling Stones concert directly in front of a flash pot that nearly set me on fire; accepting this offer was a no-brainer.]

The play focuses on two novice Mormon missionaries who are completing training for their obligatory 2-years of missionary work (Mitt Romney spent his time in France). As the play opens, the eager young acolytes are about to learn their new assignments. They’ll spend two years yoked with a partner, after completing training at the Church of Latter Day Saints Missionary Training Center (referred to as “Mission Control” at one point in the play).

Most of the new missionaries get plum assignments and celebrate:

“Norway! Trolls & gnomes!” say the first pair.

“France! Pastries & crepes!” say the next two.

“Japan! Soy sauce & Mothra!” exult the third pair.

And then Elder Price (Nic Rouleau) and Elder Cunningham (Ben Platt) (aka Kevin Price and Aaron Cunningham) receive their assignment: northern Uganda. To add to Elder Price’s chagrin, Elder Cunningham is a nerdy screw-up who has a tendency to creatively blend fact and fiction (okay—he lies), employing his overactive imagination. Aaron’s own father regards him, pretty much, as a failure and Aaron has few friends.

Elder Price, however, is the Golden Boy. (Actor Rouleau came straight from the Broadway cast). He is confident he is going to do great things. One of the songs he sings tells us this in no uncertain terms: “You and Me (But Mostly Me)” Aaron Cunningham is just glad to have a friend at all, especially one who is not supposed to leave his side at any time (according to missionary rules), since he has mostly been a friendless nerd up until now. Aaron thinks that Kevin will really be his best friend during the next two years.

A running joke has Elder Price convinced that Orlando is the epicenter of the world. (“I’m going where you need me most—Orlando.”) Maybe you have to have spent time in Orlando as an adult without a child in tow to identify with the barren concrete experience Orlando really represents. I spent 2 winters in a row there. Orlando makes northern Uganda look less bleak.

However, northern Uganda represents trouble with a capital “T.”

As the duo arrives in Uganda, their luggage is immediately stolen by warlords. The pair find that Uganda is not fertile ground for converts. There are already 10 missionaries in place who have failed to score a single baptism. And it doesn’t look good for Kevin and Aaron, since they soon learn that the poverty-stricken Uganda natives are dealing with an AIDS epidemic and a warlord whose mission is to circumcise all females in the village. Even the doctor of the village confesses (constantly), “I have maggots in my scrotum.” (This is one of the few phrases I can reprint that doesn’t involve using the “F” word or something else equally unprintable.)

After Elder Price witnesses a brutal slaying (gunshot at point blank range) Kevin announces he is giving up, requesting a transfer, and going home. Aaron is going to have to fend for himself. He does like an attractive native girl (played by 2008 “American Idol” finalist Syesha Mercado), Nabulungi. At various points, Elder Cunningham (Aaron) refers to Nabulungi as Nellie Furtado, Nala and Necrophilia, so there is that running joke, as well.

Aaron, the underdog, with Elder Price (Kevin) leaving, soon realizes he is going to have to step up to the plate. He will have to make it on his own (“man up”). As the lyric goes, “When someone had to die to save us all from sin, Jesus manned up and took it on the chin.” So, as Aaron also sings, “I’m talkin,’ they’re listenin.’ My stories are glistenin’.” He begins spinning a much more interesting version of the Mormon faith to the previously disinterested villagers. Aaron’s version incorporates elements of “Star Wars,” “Star Trek” and bits and pieces of Aaron’s creativity run amok. Elder Cunningham’s approach leads to conversions aplenty and a vision of Salt Lake City (mispronounced in the song the villagers sing about this golden place) as the Promised Land. Soon the entire village is signing up to become Mormon. One hilarious segment involves the impromptu “play” that the villagers put on for the Mormon mucky-mucks who come to Uganda to applaud the team’s unprecedented success—to the surprise and chagrin of Kevin and Aaron—letting the Powers-that-be know what they have learned about their new faith.

While the always-welcome story of the underdog made good entertainment, the funniest lines were actual tenets of the LSD Church. “I Believe,” one of the play’s most-often quoted songs (because it is one of the few clean ones) says, “A Mormon just believes and I believe it means me getting my own planet.” Joseph Smith digging up golden plates in a field in Missouri and “Who knew the Garden of Eden was in Jackson County, Missouri” or, “In 1978, God changed his mind about black people” are all true tenets of the Mormon faith—give or take a bit of poetic license with the way they’re stated onstage, and the fact that this play ran while Mitt Romney, a Mormon, was running for President of the United States just makes it all that much more apropos.

I also enjoyed the employee in the women’s rest room who had taken it upon herself to organize the lines during the 15-minute intermission. “Nobody comes in here until I say so!” barked the large African-American organizer, who let exactly 10 women in at a time and pointed out open stalls. She traffic-directed like a pro. Thanks to her, the women in the audience made it back to their seats in time for the hilarious second half.

A truly funny evening and well worth craning around a slim pillar while using small opera glasses to see the actors onstage up-close-and-personal…or at all.

ThrillerFest in New York City & Other Things That Have Kept Me Away from the Blog

By Connie Wilson

On August 6, 2012

In Books, Music, Politics, travel

I’ve been away from the keyboard for a variety of reasons:

ThrillerFest in NYC in July.

Joseph Finder, author of “Paranoia,” “Company Man,” et. al.

1) I attended ThrillerFest in New York City July 11-14 and had the opportunity to hear wisdom from many great writers. Pictures are a few. The HWA’s own W.D. Gagliani was on one panel, as was Nate Kenyon (“Diablo: The Order”). I had the opportunity to see the Terra Cotta soldiers at the Discovery Center on W. 44th Street and, as a special treat, I got to wait in LaGuardia airport from 6 p.m. until almost midnight (the plane was supposed to leave at 8 p.m.)

2) Upon our return, we spent some time at the beach with Scott, Jessica, Ava & Elise.

Ava & Elise with Grandpa at the 31st St. Beach in Chicago.

Nellicoat, the fancy restaurant on Randolph Street where we dined on my birthday with son Scott and daughter-in-law Jessica.

3) Then, of course, there was my birthday. We dined at Nellicoat, which used to be a different restaurant on Randolph, but is now very fancy.

4) July 28, Saturday: Chicago and the Doobie Brothers at Northerly Isle Pavilion (birthday celebration).

Northerly Isle Pavilion, July 28th, 2012: Chicago and the Doobie Brothers.

The Doobie Brothers appeared with Chicago this year (7/29/2012).

Chicago skyline at dusk.

5) Last, but certainly not least, I’ve been putting the finishing touches on “Hellfire & Damnation II,” which went “live” as an E-book on July 28th. It’s a truly entertaining book, with illustrations for each story and a great cover from Vincent Chong of the UK, plus a Fro the Author section explaining the inspiration for the stories. There will be a 5-day period when the book on Amazon Kindle will be free, but that has yet to be determined. Stay tuned for the exact dates, which will probably be near Halloween.

“Hellfire & Damnation II” available now in paperback from Amazon and Barnes & Noble and in Kindle E-book from Amazon. Stay tuned for free download dates, which will be somewhere near Halloween.

6) Lollapalooza has been ongoing in Chicago all weekend. I’ve been listening to the groups from my balcony, except when a very bad storm caused authorities to evacuate the park. The last band that got to play its set as originally scheduled was “Moon Taxi” from Nashville, friends of my daughter’s. At about 3:30 p.m. on Saturday, the high winds and rain swept in. However, the concert continued after a brief period of time, allowing the Red Hot Chili Peppers to perform, at least. On Sunday, Florence & the Machine and Jack White played and they sounded great.

Lollapalooza, August 3-5.

Checker Cab Limo Making Cross Country Trip

By Connie Wilson

On August 21, 2011

In Humor and Weird Wilson-isms, travel

Checker Limo in Chicago.

An uncle and nephew duo driving a Checker cab limo (25 feet, 8 doors) from California to New York visited me in Chicago, where I turned over the “keys to the condo” to the pair, so that they could enjoy Chicago Saturday, Sunday, Monday, leaving on Tuesday for Kalamazoo, Michigan, where the yellow vehicles used to be made.

George, 62, said that this particular car had been built in something like 1959 and that the vehicles were used as cabs in Alaska, where he first saw them. He was smitten with the idea of purchasing one and finally found one at an old car dealer’s in California, where the duo flew to retrieve the massive automobile and begin making a cross-country trek. I think I got into the act, somehow, because I had made the “Ghostly Tales of Route 66” trip along Route 66.

Patrick, me, and a Checker Limo.

At any rate, it was great fun meeting and greeting George and Patrick and their huge and hard-to-park car. It wasn’t too difficult figuring out where to put George and Patrick, but the car was an entirely different matter!

The Kalamazoo, Michigan paper did a story on the pair, since the cars used to be built there. I called the Chicago “Tribune” but they were underwhelmed with the story and photo op. Not me, though. I haven’t had this much excitement since I did the Oscar Mayer WeinerMobile story!

Two nice new friends who, I hope, had a great time in the Windy City.

Checker Limo Makes Cross-Country Trip